Hello Baby

 

 

“Hiiiii! Hiiii!!! Hiiii!!!!”

The little voice floats out and up into the blue hazy sky, calling me? I did notice them. The Fitness Family. Dad pushing the jogging stroller in front of him, his lean tan legs effortless in their movement forward. Mom, ponytail swinging out of the back of her baseball cap, jogging dog at her side, leashed and obedient. She’s keeping pace with Dad, but I can tell it’s an effort.

            And baby?

            I never see baby. Ensconced in the jogging stroller. But Baby musta seen me. “Hiiiii! Hiiiiii!!!” The greeting is insistent. Demanding attention. As babies do. So, I play along, “Hiiii!” I sing back, “Hiiii!” baby sings to me. “Hiiiii!” I start to laugh. Dad and Mom keep on moving. They’re not stopping to talk to anyone. They’re on a fitness mission. Running off the baby fat for mom. Out of the ZOOM office for dad. The dog eager for his morning jog.

            And baby?

            He’s just along for the ride.

            I have to say there would be something to be said for this. I wouldn’t mind if some handsome dad was pushing me along in a jogging stroller. I’d just lie there and stare up at the clouds floating in the sky. Call out to strangers walking on the sidewalk. Safe and secure in my little moving world.

            Unlike my reality. Not safe or secure at all. Why is this? I am just walking around the neighborhood. But I always run into some hazard. A near miss with a speeding car at the corner of Garvin and 30^th street. A stray dog running at me, barking and snarling. A strange person hailing me from afar, wanting something from me: peanut butter, the time of day, a kiss.

            The pandemic pacings are fraught. And, as this Fitness Family jogs by, the baby now calling out “Bye!!! Bye!!!! Bye!!!!”, are smug in their nuclear world. Jogging down the middle of the street. No worries about a car running them down. Why is this? I guess they are obvious. It’s not like the driver of the car would miss seeing them. Yet, I think how entitled this is. That the Fitness Family gets the run of the entire street, while anytime I walk in the street, I risk my life. The drivers never seem to see me even though I think how could they miss me? With my bright turquoise sun hat and red ear muffs and stalk of blond hair sticking up into the stratosphere.

            Yet, I am invisible most of the time. It’s the middle-aged lady thing. I’d heard of it all my life and had never understood, but now I get it. Middle-aged women are completely dismissed in our culture. If you’re not young and beautiful, forget it. You don’t matter. If you walk in the middle of the street, well, you deserve to get mowed down.

            Besides, who would mow down a baby?

            I might.

            Just kidding. Kinda....

            As the family jogs across Clinton, of course not pausing let alone stopping to see if there’s any traffic headed their way, I watch their easy, relentless push forward. They are so sure, so fearless, so Family.    

      

      A couple of red-breasted cuties sing out to me as I pause to let a car go by at Clinton. I wave ‘bye’ to the birds as I step off the curb. Another pandemic pacing Saturday. I pull my mask over my mouth and nose as another walker heads toward me on the sidewalk. She heads into the street, giving me the sidewalk.

            Well, someone saw me. We wave and we walk on. The sun on my back, the breeze behind me, the baby way ahead of me.

            I’m suddenly so tired. It’s been a hell of a week. I’m thankful it’s Saturday. And for the baby. Whose hi hi hi song has brightened my day. Another surprise for me on my Pandemic Pacing.